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Fantasy Game of Thrones: Season 8, Episode 4 “The Last of the Starks” scorecard

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DANY COMIN FOR THAT THRONE

HBO

I thought after the Battle of Winterfell we’d be allowed an episode of air before more chaos and craziness fell upon us and maybe we were for the first 40 or so minutes of the episode and then, BANG out of nowhere we take a 50 foot arrow straight in the heart. Good god man, give us a moment to grieve before you go right on killing characters we love. Damn you Game of Thrones. DAMN YOU!

Here’s the episode scorecard so you can score how your team did. I’ve added some highlights to give you a breakdown of some of the scoring. I also shared the teams that were tweeted our way so you can see how other teams stacked up against yours.

Let’s recap.

S8, E4 scorecard

Character Violence Sex Badassery Drinking Total
Character Violence Sex Badassery Drinking Total
Euron Greyjoy 100 100 200
Daenerys Targaryen 85 5 90
Jaime Lannister 60 5 15 80
Gendry -25 100 5 80
Brienne of Tarth 50 15 10 75
Cersei Lannister 15 40 55
Tyrion Lannister 20 20 40
Bronn 20 5 25
Tormund Giantsbane 5 10 5 20
Sansa Stark 15 5 20
The Mountain 15 5 20
The Hound 10 5 15
Arya Stark 10 10
Podrick 5 5 10
Varys 10 10
Davos Seaworthy 5 5 10
Samwell Tarly 5 5
Qyburn 5 5
Jon Snow -5 -5

Highlights

  • I realized what made Rhaegal’s death so surprising while re-watching the episode this morning to score it: the music! When Dany and her crew are pullin’ up on Dragonstone, the music is cheerful and triumphant and you’re feeling good about yourself and everything that’s going down on screen. THEN BAM! Mother effing Euron comes out of nowhere with a big ass bolt straight to the heart and to the neck and down goes Rhaegal (+100 killing dragon, +100 OH SHIT). That’s all Euron does this episode but it’s enough to get him the top spot.
  • I’m a big fan of how that scene was done by the way. It perfectly capsulized the idea of Cersei and her army spending all this time preparing for Danny and her dragons while her whole crew was off fighting the White Walkers. Also, not an unproductive day for Cersei herself who “killed” Missandei (+15) (I’m giving her that since she called the sentence, just like Sansa and Arya getting +15 for killing Little Finger), and dropped some knowledge on Euron telling him it’s his child (+15). Do we believe her? Eh who knows. But still some news that’ll have some big time ramifications either way.
  • Shoutout to the final epic staring match that Dany and Cersei shared. I clocked Dany over 10 seconds multiple times.
  • Dany had her usual +25 for riding a dragon and +15 for crying over the body of Jorah. Her biggest accomplishment this episode though was making Gendry a lord. Now I didn’t quite consider that a OH SHIT moment so I compromised by giving her +20 for revealing something big and +10 for formally announcing his name. Feel free to battle me in the comments if you think that’s unjust but I’m not sure a lord-ing is worthy of 100 points.
  • BUT PROPOSING TO ARYA STARK IS DEF 100 POINTS! Even when I was watching the episode again I found myself muttering “oh shit” when Gendry gets down on one knee. That being said, hard -30 (double the -15 for having sex interrupted) for Arya rejecting him. I don’t know who’s more crush: Gendry or everyone who watched the show who wanted Arya and Gendry to have a Philip Rivers’ sized family of master class assassins.
  • Who saw Pod go off with two ladies to do the midnight tango (+5)? *golf clap*
  • Speaking of sex, way to go Brienne for having your first sexual encounter be the one that steers Jaime out of the gene pool (+50 to both). Jaime also with some strong pickup lines talking about how hot the room is and how he needs to get naked (+5). I see you Jaime.
  • SO MUCH DRINKING in this episode (+5 each time). Once for basically everyone in the episode (including guest star Bronn), twice for Brienne, three times for Jaime and a whopping four for Tyrion who’s clearly back in his party ways. Also, shoutout to feminist Tyrion rejecting the notion that simply having a cock is a qualification for the throne. You go girl!
  • Meanwhile, Jon does his best “drunk college guy who’s partner just came back from the library studying and wants to get down so he tries his not to seem as drunk as he is” impression, and fails. Miserably. (-5)
  • The biggest takeaway from this episode is never tell Sansa your secrets. Jon tells his sibs about his true heritage, making them all swear to silence and then within the hour, Sansa’s telling Tyrion who’s the true king of Westeros. The only way I’ma be cool with this is if this is all part of Sansa’s plan to sit on the Iron Throne. Then I’m in.

Standings

Rank Name Episode 4 score Team Season 8 score
Rank Name Episode 4 score Team Season 8 score
1 RotoLando 300 Euron, Tormund, Brienne, Qyburn 735
2 Brandon Tribble 285 Euron, Jaime, Harry Strickland, Qyburn 990
3 Pete 280 Euron, Gendry, Yara, Harry Strickland 1020
4 Mark 220 Euron, Tormund, Harry Strickland, Yara 440
5 Becca 195 Daenerys, Gendry, Yara, Bronn 1065
6 Toosh VV 195 Jaime, Hound, Gendry, Mountain 195
7 griffin 195 Jaime, Hound, Brienne, Bronn 195
8 Matt Leach 180 Brienne, Yara Greyjoy, The Mountain, Jaime, Qyburn 775
9 misto 155 Tyrion, The Hound, Gendry, The Mountain 510
10 Branden Johnson 140 The Hound, The Mountain, Jamie, and Bronn 765
11 CT 135 Daenerys, Tyrion, Missandei, Qyburn 905
12 Brandon Gerber 120 Daenerys, Sam, Bronn, Missandei, Qyburn 730
13 Heath 105 Jon, Jaime, Bronn, Qyburn 780
14 Rich Resch 100 Cersei, Tormund, Harry Strickland, Bronn 705
15 Paddi 100 Cersei, Tyrion, Yara, Qyburn 545
16 Brian 100 Cersei, Tormund, Yara, Bronn 400
17 Kate 95 Cersei, Bronn, The Hound, Yara 600
18 rotoking2653 95 Cersei, Tormund, Harry Strickland, The Mountain 95
19 Andrew Schuba 70 Tyrion, Sansa, Varys, Harry Strickland 385
20 behumble 50 Arya, Davos, Bronn, Yara, Qyburn 855
21 Gabe Champ 40 Tyrion, Bran, Sam, Missandei 510
22 Raymon Trost 35 Qyburn, Jon, Pod, Bronn 105
23 Kailey 0 -- 705
24 Randall Castro 0 -- 590
25 Billy 0 -- 210
26 Josh Spaunhorst 0 -- 265
27 Bill Harney 0 -- 80
28 Ryan Hodge 0 -- 70
29 Jake Newsome 0 -- 65
30 Eddie Cange 0 -- 35
31 Max Power 0 -- 15