EPL Fantasy Preview: Week 22

I'm back and ready to screw up your fantasy teams in a new year! Let's skip the introduction and get right to who to sit and who to play this weekend:

Goalkeepers

• Peter Cech (Chelsea) - Just named the best goalkeeper in the Premier League, Cech will be going up against one of the worst Manchester United teams in years. No Rooney OR van Persie this week. (VERDICT: PLAY)
• Maarten Stekelenburg (Fulham) - What can I say about this Fulham team? They get their butt kicked by a horrible Sunderland side in the Premier League last weekend BUT decides that they want to advance in the FA Cup for some reason. I am not looking forward to relegation. (VERDICT: BENCH)
• Any Goalies Against Manchester City for the Rest of the Year - BENCH! Seriously, City is Sherman right now and the opposing goals are Atlanta.

Defenders

• Per Mertesacker (Arsenal) - I could beat him on the dribble. (VERDICT: BENCH)
• Phil Jones (Manchester United) - He's going to be busy against Chelsea. He might be their only hope. (VERDICT: PLAY)
• Ben Davies (Swansea City) - I have him on my team. I trust this lad. STULTZ GUARANTEE OF THE WEEK! (VERDICT: PLAY)
• Sebastien Bassong (Norwich City) - ALSO ON MY TEAM! I don't trust him as much. (VERDICT: BENCH)

Midfielders

• Mezut Ozil (Arsenal) - If you don't play the German, you are a moron. (VERDICT: PLAY)
• Mark Noble (West Ham) - Going against a Newcastle side that seems to score goals by the bunch. Hey, remember when Newcastle got relegated a few years back? That was awesome. (VERDICT: BENCH)
• Damien Duff (Fulham) - If you ARE going to get relegated, please put me out of my misery early and not have it happen on the last day. I have already had too many heart-stopping sports moments in 2014 and it is only halfway through January. (VERDICT: BENCH)
• Jordan Henderson (Liverpool) - Sounds like he should be running an ad agency instead of playing football. Names don't mean everything though. (VERDICT: PLAY)

Forwards

• Clint Dempsey (Fulham) - WOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! HE'S BACK!!!!! If he doesn't score this week, I will write next week's column completely sober. (VERDICT: PLAY, because you love America!)
• Luis Suarez (Liverpool) - Really? (VERDICT: PLAY)
• Romelu Lukaku (Everton) - He has REALLY disappointed me the last few weeks. (VERDICT: BENCH)
• Cameron Jerome (Crystal Palace) - See you in the Championship League next year Palace! (VERDICT: BENCH)

I would like to thank Nabae for filling in for me last week. I was still recovering from my trip to Los Angeles at the beginning of the year. As always, feel free to tweet me (@brianjstultz) or email me (brianjstultz@gmail.com) before, during and after the matches. Come On You Whites! I have a beer on this game with "die-hard" Arsenal fan Joe Swart.